by Terry L. Sumerlin
One day an old-timer, who was born in San Antonio and had never lived anywhere else, was in the barbershop. The conversation involved Austin, and I was shocked by what the old gentleman had to say.
Keep in mind that Austin is about 75 miles straight up I-35 N. Occasionally it can be driven in about an hour. There are times, however, because of heavy traffic it might take closer to three days.
Anyway, when the old-timer heard the reference to Austin his only comment was, “You know, one of the days I need to get up there. I’ve heard that’s a real nice place.”
He’d lived eighty something years in San Antonio and had never been to Austin! My guess is he didn’t get out much. However, today I felt like I was that old gentleman.
The situation involved one of the things I like to do in connection with speaking – acting. Several years ago I took acting lessons, which I think greatly improved the entertainment value of my presentations. It also equipped me to do auditions for television commercials and industry training videos. So, today I was in Austin to audition for a Farm Bureau Insurance commercial.
The trip up there and the audition seemed to go well. Nothing unusual occurred. I played the part of a preacher conducting a wedding ceremony. Piece of cake!
When I finished the audition and headed home, that’s when the problem occurred. I decided to take a different route back to I-35. How difficult could that be? The highway runs right through the middle of Austin. Couldn’t miss it I tried. Wrong!
With my mind still on the audition, and with a change in my route, I wound up on the wrong highway. Then I had to figure out how to correct my mistake. So, I exited, turned around and headed back the other way - only to get on another wrong highway.
This time, in order to turn around I decided to take a shortcut and follow the tracks of the illegal cars that had driven across the median. Not exactly consistent with the role I’d just played in the audition.
Suddenly, with cars whizzing past me on both sides of the median, I’m joined by a motorcycle cop with lights flashing and siren blaring. The thought crossed my mind that perhaps I’d done something really stupid.
“Good afternoon, sir,” he said. “I’ve stopped you because you are illegally crossing a median. May I see your license and proof of insurance?”
“Yes, sir,” I said as I reached for my wallet.” “I’m SO sorry, officer. I have been downtown and am trying to get back on I-35, but I have taken the wrong highway twice. I’m hopelessly lost and totally confused.”
“Where are you going?” he asked. When I told him I was headed home to San Antonio, he responded very kindly by telling me how to get to I-35.
He also told me something that helped keep the cost of the material for this column to merely time and fuel. “Normally, I would write you a ticket. But, since you’re from out of town, and obviously lost, I’m not going to do that.” Then in order to get me off the median, he said, “There’s a break in the traffic now. You’d better hurry.”
I breathed a sigh of relief, and began thinking about what I’d learned. Obviously, I’d re-learned that it’s always best to avoid illegal or stupid activities. But, there is also a leadership principle in all this.
LEADERSHIP PRINCIPLE: When you’re wrong and you know your wrong and the whole world knows your wrong – admit it quickly and emphatically.
Copyright@ 2009 American City Business Journals
Sunday, November 01, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
THE CASE FOR DECENCY
by Terry L. Sumerlin
A customer, knowing I’m a subscriber, asked if I had ever listened to a certain station on satellite radio. When I answered that I had not he said that he was shocked when he had once come across that station while driving. A “comedian,” he said, was “joking” about child molestation, and had even irreverently involved God in his sick, sadistic monologue. What shocked my friend was not simply what the comedian had said (though that was certainly bad enough), but that the audience was laughing hysterically!
I commented that I would not even want to be near the comedian for fear lightening might hit both of us. I then told him about a speaking experience I had many years ago that similarly demonstrated a lack of decency.
I was all excited about the opportunity. The engagement was at the Hyatt Regency Hill Country Resort (San Antonio), and I would actually be paid. Not much, mind you, but more than the usual “thank you” and a few “atta boys.” Sherry had finally convinced me being paid was a much better business plan.
Before I spoke we had a wonderful dinner, and I was able to chat briefly with the men and women of the franchise who were seated at my table. Shortly, however, I realized I had nothing to contribute to the conversation - because it involved ribald comments about condoms.
I was aghast that the men would joke about such in the presence of ladies. To say the least, it seemed like a case of sexual harassment. But, then, I noticed the ladies didn’t seem all that uncomfortable.
As my customer and I discussed both his story and mine, we began to also talk about the general lack of decency in our society. It’s frightfully disturbing. Sexually explicit language and pornography are rampant and getting worse.
Admittedly, I’m from another generation. Thankfully, I was reared in a generation that thought you had to have a pornograph to view pornography. If a kid asked his parents where he came from, he was likely told, “from Houston” (or some other city). The parent who fully explained the birds and the bees to his teenager was about as rare as one who sided with the teenager against a teacher.
Yet, even though I’m part of that generation, I do believe that those parents today who educate their children regarding sex represent change long overdue. And, incidentally, if our parents had not had sex and produced children, odds are pretty strong we wouldn’t either.
Yet, all that said, why must so many adults act as if the present generation invented sex? And, why is there so little shame and such gross immaturity in otherwise grown people? More importantly, how are these attitudes affecting individuals and society?
Norman Cousins said in the Saturday Review, for which he was senior editor for over 30 years: “The trouble with this wide open pornography…is not that it corrupts, but that it desensitizes; not that it unleashes the passions, but that it cripples the emotions; not that it encourages a mature attitude, but that it is a reversion to infantile obsessions; not that it removes the blinders, but that it distorts the view. Prowess is proclaimed, but love is denied. What we have is not liberation, but dehumanization.”
LEADERSHIP PRINCIPLE: The best leaders are those good, decent, sensitive people who deeply respect themselves and all others.
Copyright @ 2009 American City Business Journals
A customer, knowing I’m a subscriber, asked if I had ever listened to a certain station on satellite radio. When I answered that I had not he said that he was shocked when he had once come across that station while driving. A “comedian,” he said, was “joking” about child molestation, and had even irreverently involved God in his sick, sadistic monologue. What shocked my friend was not simply what the comedian had said (though that was certainly bad enough), but that the audience was laughing hysterically!
I commented that I would not even want to be near the comedian for fear lightening might hit both of us. I then told him about a speaking experience I had many years ago that similarly demonstrated a lack of decency.
I was all excited about the opportunity. The engagement was at the Hyatt Regency Hill Country Resort (San Antonio), and I would actually be paid. Not much, mind you, but more than the usual “thank you” and a few “atta boys.” Sherry had finally convinced me being paid was a much better business plan.
Before I spoke we had a wonderful dinner, and I was able to chat briefly with the men and women of the franchise who were seated at my table. Shortly, however, I realized I had nothing to contribute to the conversation - because it involved ribald comments about condoms.
I was aghast that the men would joke about such in the presence of ladies. To say the least, it seemed like a case of sexual harassment. But, then, I noticed the ladies didn’t seem all that uncomfortable.
As my customer and I discussed both his story and mine, we began to also talk about the general lack of decency in our society. It’s frightfully disturbing. Sexually explicit language and pornography are rampant and getting worse.
Admittedly, I’m from another generation. Thankfully, I was reared in a generation that thought you had to have a pornograph to view pornography. If a kid asked his parents where he came from, he was likely told, “from Houston” (or some other city). The parent who fully explained the birds and the bees to his teenager was about as rare as one who sided with the teenager against a teacher.
Yet, even though I’m part of that generation, I do believe that those parents today who educate their children regarding sex represent change long overdue. And, incidentally, if our parents had not had sex and produced children, odds are pretty strong we wouldn’t either.
Yet, all that said, why must so many adults act as if the present generation invented sex? And, why is there so little shame and such gross immaturity in otherwise grown people? More importantly, how are these attitudes affecting individuals and society?
Norman Cousins said in the Saturday Review, for which he was senior editor for over 30 years: “The trouble with this wide open pornography…is not that it corrupts, but that it desensitizes; not that it unleashes the passions, but that it cripples the emotions; not that it encourages a mature attitude, but that it is a reversion to infantile obsessions; not that it removes the blinders, but that it distorts the view. Prowess is proclaimed, but love is denied. What we have is not liberation, but dehumanization.”
LEADERSHIP PRINCIPLE: The best leaders are those good, decent, sensitive people who deeply respect themselves and all others.
Copyright @ 2009 American City Business Journals
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